Random thoughts

People who can legally get married suck ass. Yes, I'm jealous and I'm angry. I don't care if you didn't make the rules; I don't want to hear about your taffeta and lace, reception and giggling bridesmaids. I deserve the right to get married so I can be miserable like all the other married people on earth.

I'm hungry and nothing sounds good.

My right ovary was aching earlier. Thankfully, the twinges have ended.

I think Twinkies can last forever. Is that true?

I should start carrying a lunchbox again. That would rock.

I can taste the chemicals in the tap water I'm drinking. That's probably not good.

At this moment, I am so sick of being single that I could scream. I need a date, a girlfriend, a wife, a life partner, someone to come home to, someone to sleep next to, someone with whom to make love, someone whose hand I can hold, someone who loves me as I love them, someone with whom I can exchange vows, someone who makes me smile, someone who makes me feel special, someone who wants to be showered with affection, someone with whom I can shower and someone with whom I can simply talk, joke, and co-exist.

I want a new style for my hair. Maybe Serena can hook me up with her expensive hairstylist who apparently works magic with hair.

I want it to be August so I can eat vegetarian food, hear live music, and pee outside.

My office has too few gay people.

I want to hire a maid to clean my apartment, but I'm afraid whomever I hired would say, "I'm sorry, we don't clean ginormous messes like this" and then I would be right back where I started.

I'm thinking about applying for a part-time job at a spay/neuter clinic so that I can play with the cats and dogs. Yes, I know I would have to clean up poo. That's okay. They have tile floors.